--How far we've come(open)

[indiansfan01]

Making small talk was something Ianto had never been good at. Trying to make small talk was even worse for him when that small talk happened to be about his life. Ianto knew that being distracted could sometimes be the difference between life and death in this job so it was important to have someone to talk to about his problems but Ianto hardly found himself in a life or death situation right now and, from the way things were going so far this morning, he didn’t think much of anything would happen today. Ianto could deal with his dreams on his own. They were just dreams, after all, nothing that he couldn’t handle.

So, in response to Jack’s question, all Ianto could do was look him in the face and say, ”Fine, Jack.” Lying to the boss….not a very smart idea, especially when Ianto wasn’t an exceedingly convincing at telling lies. Hopefully, though, Jack would just leave well enough alone. Besides, none of this was really fair, was it? Jack wanted to know about Ianto’s personal life when Jack himself was never all that willing to divulge his own personal life with his friends. Jack was willing to help others out with their problems and, yet, he was unwilling to let others help him out.

Ianto took a sip of his coffee, focusing his eyes straight ahead now, enjoying the silence as much as he could. But the lie he had had to tell Jack brought the dream he was trying so desperately to forget right back up to the forefront of his mind. All of a sudden keeping the dream to himself didn’t seem like such a great idea to Ianto and, if he couldn’t tell the man he was sleeping with about it, who could he tell?

He let out a small sigh, looking down into his coffee cup. ”Every night I dream of her,” he began, knowing he didn’t need to say who the ‘her’ was. He finally looked back over at Jack again, not bothering to hide the tears that were already starting to well about in his eyes as he remembered Lisa’s face. ”I wanted to marry her, Jack. I wanted to have a family with her. But now because of y…” Ianto trailed off, taking the time to wipe his tears away from his eyes. ”I’m sorry. I know it’s not your fault she’s gone.”





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_{Word Count 402
Inspiration Music today!
Tags Jack/Open
Status Complete
Notes =)
Template By Arro @ Caution 2.0
Picture By Google Image}
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[jacky]

I NEED ANOTHER STORY. SOMETHING TO GET OFF MY CHEST.
I'M GONNA GIVE ALL MY SECRETS AWAY.
TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR. SOMETHING THAT WAS LIKE THOSE YEARS.
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Jack nodded his head, accepting Ianto's answer but he didn't buy it. For some reason he felt as though he was lying. Almost as if something wasn't quite right in the way he said it. Jack's blue eyes observed Ianto as he stared down at the coffee cup and he decided to keep his mouth shut. If there was anything that Ianto didn't want to talk about then he would respect that and allow him to keep somethings to himself. But he at least wanted the younger man to know, that no matter what, Jack's ears were always open and he was always listening to him. No matter what the problem or situation anyone on his team should be able to talk to him, but especially the ones that didn't seem to be as outgoing.

Jack played with the coffee awkwardly in his hands, twirling the cup around some and watching the liquid tilt and twist. When he heard the Welshman give a sigh he looked up and cocked his head to the side slightly as he started to speak. The first words out of his mouth gave Jack's heart a terrible plummeting feeling as he auto-matically knew who "her" was. But he wasn't going to be a coward about this or back down. He was going to stand and listen and try and amend the damage he had done. Sure, it had been for the good of the team, and sure he may not have really felt any remorse at the time, but he felt the pain of it now, at moments like this when these kind of things were brought up.

When he saw tears forming in Ianto's eyes Jack almost got up himself to try and comfort him, to wipe them away but he stopped himself as Ianto went to speak again, not wanting to distract himself from the conversation. His eyes looked at the floor as he tried not to concentrate too much on the person speaking to him, instead trying to listen to the words as calmly as he could.

”I wanted to marry her, Jack. I wanted to have a family with her"

The older man winced slightly at this comment. Of course it was deeper then just simple dating between Lisa and him wasn't it? It wasn't a simple fling at the office like it was now between he and Jack? They probably would have ended up doing those things , if non of this had happened. Part of the immortal wanted to blame it all on the battle at The Wharf, but he knew that, saying that wouldn't be fair. He felt a small twinge of gratitude as Ianto told him that it wasn't his fault what happened, but it didn't matter, this wasn't about him right now. This was about someone else and trying to help them through it. No matter what he did, Jack knew he could never erase that memory, but he refused to let it torment the young tea-boy.

He stood up and tentatively walked towards Ianto, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and and resting the other on his back in a comforting gesture, almost as if he was trying to comfort a small child.

"I'm so sorry Ianto.",he said quietly, his voice quieter then he had meant, in the amount of sadness that he was feeling.
"I wish things had gone differently. I would do anything to go back.", which was true, had his wrist strap been powered up and allowing him time travel he would have tried to change what happened. He lied awake in bed many times thinking about doing that. But then he knew there were so many consequences for messing with time like that. It was just so hard sometimes. To deal with things like this.

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tagged: open
words: 661
outfit: ----
notes:.....

THIS TEMPLATE WAS MADE BY RACHIZZLE OF CAUTION 2.0. THE LYRICS ARE CREDITED TO ONE REPUBLIC. DON'T REMOVE THESE CREDS. THANKS FOR USING!

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[indiansfan01]

During his little speech, Ianto hadn’t even realized that he had gotten up from the couch or that he had wisely put his coffee cup down on one of the work stations. He probably could have walked off a cliff during his speech and not realized it. Whoever said that time heals all wounds was wrong. Ianto knew that pining over his lost loved one wasn’t going to bring her back and it certainly wasn’t going to help him move on and get on with his life but Ianto couldn’t help it. She had been his first and only serious relationship.

When Jack came over to wrap his arms around him in a comforting manner, Ianto knew that he had been right to tell Jack about the dreams. He needed someone to know—someone who could then be there for him, help him get over what had happened. And, just as equally important, Ianto felt that Jack needed someone too—someone he felt he could talk to about things that might be driving him crazy. Ianto understood that it was a long shot that Jack would ever pour his soul and heart out to him about his troubled past but as long as Jack knew that he was there for him if he ever needed to do so Ianto could live with that fact.

Jack’s words, though, didn’t feel as comforting to Ianto because Ianto wasn’t sure that he would want to go back in time and change things, even if he could. He wasn’t one to believe that everything happened for a reason but something as traumatic and tragic as what had happened to him and Lisa had to have a reason. And, as much as Ianto would always love Lisa and as unsure of what he believed he and Jack had going on right now, Ianto didn’t want to lose what he and Jack currently had together.

Ianto laid his head against Jack’s shoulder, wanting nothing more than to be as close as possible to the older man. It wasn’t going to completely erase his pain but at least it was going to help alleviate it a little bit. All Ianto could think about when Jack had disappeared on the team after coming back from the 1940’s was how much he longed to be able to hold Jack again. Maybe what they had going on was more than an office fling, and that meant that it was worth holding onto. Besides, even if he did go back in the past, who was to say that his future wouldn’t end up turning out even worse than it had?

He basked in silence for a moment. He couldn’t tell Jack that he didn’t want to go back in time because he believed they had something special going on right now. He didn’t know how Jack would react to that news. He didn’t even know if Jack felt the same way about him as Ianto did. Instead, Ianto felt that it was time to focus on something else other than his troubled past…Something that might give him an answer to that question nagging the back of his mind.

”How do you do it?” he asked, disentangling Jack from him so he could look into the Captain’s eyes. ”You’re going to live forever. You’ve lost loved ones…You’re going to continue losing loved ones. In thousands of years, you won’t even remember me. How do you get up every day? How do you move on?” At least Ianto’s pain was going to be finite; it was going to end with his death.






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_{Word Count 599
Inspiration George Strait <3
Tags Jack/Open
Status Complete
Notes =)
Template By Arro @ Caution 2.0
Picture By Google Image}
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